A mum who nursed her "heart of gold" son for the final 10 weeks of his life has paid tribute to his courage in the face of cancer. Adam Clarke moved in with his mum, Suzanne, and step-dad Alan last November after doctors told him he had a rare and extremely aggressive form of the disease which would not respond to treatment.
Between frequent emergency hospital visits, Suzanne and Adam's closest family, including two of his sisters and his niece cared for him in his final days, until he died with them at his bedside at Suzanne's home in Birstall on Tuesday, January 14. He was just 42.
Suzanne, 61, said: "I knew about the cancer for 10 weeks, but Adam had known two weeks before he told me about it. He said the doctors had told him there were no treatment options for him. He said 'Mum, its my time'.
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"He did not want to be treated any differently, so he protected people from it. That's why people are so shocked. They knew he had some medical issues, but they had no idea he was terminally ill.
"Even friends who had visited him in hospital, he did not tell them he was terminal. He was so strong-minded. That was how he wanted to do it."
Adam, who lived in Shepshed, had suffered poor health for a number of years and lived with COPD, emphysema and asthma. In 2017, half of his right lung had to be removed.
He sought medical advice last October when he began to lose feeling in his arm and shoulder and the arm began to swell. He was also finding it difficult to swallow. A biopsy later confirmed he had cancer in his lung, lymph nodes and blood vessels.
However, he kept the diagnosis to himself initially, spending the first two weeks alone at home. At that point, he decided it was time to disclose his news and, without revealing his intentions, asked his sister, Danielle, to organise a family dinner at her home.
He invited Suzanne and Alan as well as two of her closest friends, knowing she would need them to be there to support and console her after he told her he was terminally ill and had very little time left. Danielle and her husband were also present.
Suzanne said: "Even at the table I was thinking what a handsome man he was and that he had such a beautiful smile. But he had an ice-pack under his arm. I said to him 'Adam, there's something wrong. You are not well'."
He spoke to her away from the others and told her his news. Suzanne said: "He told me about the cancer and that he had already decided he wanted to move in with Alan and I.
"He came home and we took care of him. It was horrific to see him deteriorate in that final 10 weeks. He went downhill very quickly. He had not had the best of health for a long time, but this was cruel beyond words. He was in and out of hospital throughout those 10 weeks, but he hated being there, so he always checked himself out and came home."
Adam loved playing pool and competed at clubs across the city and county. He tried to take part in a match during the final few weeks of his life but ended up in hospital again, Suzanne said.
She said: "Pool was his life. He was determined to take part in his final match and wouldn't give in, but he couldn't raise his arm to play. He dropped to his knees because he couldn't breathe." He was rushed back into hospital with respiratory failure.
"He was still smiling the night before he died, even though he was really struggling. He was so strong," she added. "On his final day, when we thought he had passed away, I said to him 'I hope we have made you feel loved'.
"He opened his eyes and took one last breath and he was gone. I will never forget it."
Adam has asked his family to hold on to his ashes until his 12-year-old chocolate-coloured Labrador, Bella, passes away. He wants their ashes to be scattered together in Greece, one of his favourite places.
Suzanne said: "He loved nature and being outdoors and he absolutely adored Bella. He took her everywhere with him. When he passed away she ran into the room and jumped on the bed, wagging her tail 10 to the dozen. It wasn't that she was sad, it was like she was happy he'd been released."
Suzanne said. Bella is in poor health and has a growth on her body which is to be examined by a vet, she added.
"Adam had the most beautiful smile and he would always help anyone in need. At school he would always be there for anyone who was being bullied because he always looked out for the underdog," she said. "That's the way he was as a boy and that's the way he was as a man. He had a heart of gold."
Adam's funeral will take place at Loughborough Crematorium at 11.30am on Friday, March 7. Family and friends will then gather at the Rothley Court, in Westfield Lane, Rothley.
The suddenness of Adam's death has left the family in difficulty. They have launched an appeal on the Go Fund Me website for contributions toward the cost of his funeral. More information, including how to make a donation can be found by searching Adam Clark on the GoFundMe website.
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